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Oral Sex: Fellatio
How To Give A Blow Job & Do It Well
Along with tips on how to best ask for a blow job.

Explore not only how to give a great blow job but how to ask for one as well. Learn blow job techniques that will excite any man as well as things that you should avoid when giving a blow job. Find out what the number one blow job tip is when it comes to great oral sex.

Whether you want to call it giving head, a blow job / BJ, oral sex, going down on... there are many wonderful benefits to performing this delicious sex act. In this article we will review blow job instruction with great tips to help you make it amazing whether you give or receive.

Lisa Lawless
By Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D.
Psychotherapist & Sexuality Expert

CEO & Founder of
Holistic Wisdom, Inc. & NAASAS

Copyright: Holistic Wisdom- Do NOT Copy Warning

Copyright Holistic Wisdom, Inc.

Fellatio

The term fellatio comes from the Latin word fellare, which means to suck. In fellatio the head and shaft of the penis are licked, kissed and sucked.

Blow Job - Fellatio Instruction

 

How To Ask For Blow Job

The best way to ask for a blow job is to work on seduction. Tell your special someone how much you desire them and that you have been fantasizing about how it would feel to have their mouth and tongue sliding up and down you. The key point here is that that you flatter them with your desire, it is not a demand or an awkward question. You can also start with giving oral sex and then asking for reciprocation. If you have been together a long time, you can make it more pleasant for them by sharing flavored lubricants and special oral sex toys discussed and shown later in this article.

Let's first discuss the most important ingredient to giving fantastic fellatio... ATTITUDE.

For one, it can provide the one giving the blow job with an sexually empowered sense of control and with specialized techniques, there are infinite possibilities to be creative and provide amazing pleasure. Particularly when performed with enthusiasm it can not only be incredible to the receiver but to the one providing it as well even if the techniques are not there. Combine them and you will be on your way to being a fantastic lover.

If you approach this as something that disgusts you, or even a chore then in my opinion, you shouldn't bother doing it. No matter how many cool tips you know, you will never give really good head with out desire driving it. Sex should be fun and exciting to each partner no matter what you are doing.

Several women I know have told me that they will exchange favors with their husband when he desires fellatio. For example, one friend told me that her husband will do the dishes for a week just to get a blow job. I have to say that if that is the kinda of sex life you have... you are missing out on some serious passion. But do not panic, no matter where you are in your relationship you can change it for the better.


Don't ever underestimate the power of your perceptions. If you perceive any sex act, including fellatio to be dirty, repulsive, or a chore then it will be.

My husband and I always say that desire starts in the mind and honestly I see nothing more important to a good sex life than your attitude and perception toward it. That is why I always suggest communication as it provides a way to talk about what really turns you on. It also gives you the opportunity to work through old belief systems about sex that no longer serve you and end up holding you back sexually.

You don't want to make the mistake of thinking that figuring out what the best techniques are will make you the best lover. Remembering that attitude will make up for any lack of technique is probably the best sex advice you'll ever get!


Oral Sex 411

Cunnilingus
The Art of Female Oral Sex Techniques, Anatomy, Video Clips & Detailed Instruction

 


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Blow Job eManual
Blow Job tips with detailed techniques, pics and video!

 

Flavored Lubricant Reviews
What We & Our Customers Really Think About The Taste!

Understanding the Importance of Attitude

Negative Attitude

Imagine that you and your lover have found yourselves in the bedroom. He is laying on the bed and had negotiated a blow job. So, you walk over, pull his pants down quickly to get right down to business. You open you mouth and move your head quickly up and down. Like a robot, you have no variation and exhibit no passion. After all, you want to get this over with and are just trying to get him to cum. Before you began you instructed him to tell you when he was going to orgasm because you want to be warned. After all, this is something that you are going to want to be prepared to avoid. When he finally cums you jerk you face away and let him do so all over himself. You run to the bathroom to rinse out your mouth and brush your teeth and do not return as you have things you have to do.

Positive Attitude

Imagine that you and your lover have a moment of flirtation. You move closer to your lover, moving him down on the bed and smiling as you do it. As he lies there, you slide down to his pants, you seductively remove them. You give him looks as though you want to devour him. To you, he looks like candy just waiting to be tasted. You lick and run you fingers all over his shaft and balls not neglecting his inner thighs and abdomen area. You reach to your sexy stash and grab some warming, flavored lubricant so that you can slowly pour it over his cock as though you are pouring chocolate syrup over a sundae. Lightly licking his balls you use your hand to firmly grasp the base of his shaft and slide you hand up and down his shaft. You take your time as you approach the head of his cock and give him an even more firm squeeze as you get there. As things progress, you move your mouth to the tip of his cock and lick while teasing him with your seductive eye contact. As you slide his hot, hard cock into your mouth you let out a little moan and start grinding your genitals on his leg. This turns you on and you want him to know it. After fucking him with your hands and mouth, while giving him dazzling visual displays of rubbing his cock all over your face; you feel him ready to release his desire. You fuck him now deeply into the back of your throat until he comes so hard that his legs press against your head from the intensity. Afterward you move up to him and embrace him telling him how hot that was for you.

Striking Difference

Are you seeing a difference here? Even if you decide to give a 'quickie' blow job, your attitude allows you to be the best he's ever had. Men, just like women, want to feel desired, so to make him feel like orally pleasuring him is repulsive to you is certainly a 'blow' to his ego. Show him that you desire him no matter what sexual activity you do and you will really make it fantastic.

Why Men Love it So Much

Many men LOVE receiving oral sex and this is true for a few reasons. It of course feels good, but it also makes them feel desired. Often times, a man is made to feel ridiculous for the focus on his penis, but women are no different. We worry about our push-up bras and how big our butt looks in an outfit. We also enjoy intimate contact like snuggling and of course we also enjoy sexual stimulation.

When you start doing things like negotiating doing the dishes for sex, you are downright insulting them. After all, how would you feel if someone told you that in order to be sexually intimate with you that you had to do the dishes first?

No wonder men and women often think of fellatio as something a bit dirty... we tend to make it that way don't we? Cleaning the dishes is dirty and undesirable and yet it gets compared to the equivalent of fellatio? We also often think of it as derogatory to the giver... yet in reality it is an opportunity to take control! I think when we take negative attitudes toward our sex life then the true beauty of love and sex is terribly belittled.

Even when a person chooses to be with a variety of partners while dating or through open relationships, we can really enjoy sex on a deeper level when we let ourselves truly BE with people. Being aware of the beauty of sensuality in our partner(s) and ourselves is what makes any sexual experience an amazing one. Isn't that true of anything in life? How often do we drive to work not even taking a moment to notice the beautiful sun shining down through the clouds and lighting the world up with its brilliance. How about how often we shove food down our throats without taking the time to really enjoy each morsel of what we are eating?

Liberator Gear

The same applies to sex... when we are mindful of our partner(s) and our own needs, sensations, and emotions then we will be better able to truly enjoy what life has to offer when it comes to oral sex or any kind of sexual activity. Try it just once and I am certain you will be amazed at the difference. If you find it is still uncomfortable then you may need more than an attitude adjustment, you may need to explore deeper issues that inhibit you from enjoying your sexual experiences.

Important-

You can get STDs (including HIV-AIDS) from giving oral sex.

You do not have to swallow or "deep throat" a man to give good oral sex.


What Is Cum (Semen)?

A man's semen is about the amount of a teaspoon and it is not unhealthy, fattening (the average ejaculation is approximately 15 calories) and it will not get you pregnant.

Deep Throat Or Not To Deep Throat

Often people think that someone highly skilled in the art of fellatio will not only deep throat, but will do it for the entire length of the blow job. Nothing could be further from the truth. Of course if you are comfortable with it then by all means deep throat him during the course of oral sex, but if you are not using other techniques with your tongue, lips, hands and fingers then you are probably giving a rather boring blow job. Also, the sheer fatigue that you experiences can change your attitude quickly so changing things up helps a great deal.

The pleasure from a blow job is created through deep throating is created by the uvula pressing on the frenulum which massages the corona. Translation- it is a snug, warm, wet environment and a most pleasurable place for a penis. The average depth of our mouth cavity is 3 - 4 inches and the average penis size is 5 6 inches, thus you can see the difficulty in getting a full penis in your mouth and down your throat.

This leads us to the breathing issue. If you are deep throating your partner, then you are most likely cutting off your air supply for certain amounts of time. Learning to breathe through your nose or taking breaks by using your hands is a good way to maintain the pleasurable flow of stimulation to his penis.

Gagging Remedies

  • It happens to the best of us and the main thing to remember that psychologically you need to not panic. Panicking can cause you to vomit and that is the last thing you want to do.

  • Gagging can be assisted through use of numbing agents like sore throat sprays and drops. You will want to be aware however, that using them may very well numb your partner unless he has a condom on. Also be aware that by using products with Benzocaine that there have been health issues tied to them so you may want to be careful using the often if at all.

  • Because a blow job should not just be about up and down motions or even deep throating you can use your hands quite a bit to help you. Often times, when you squeeze at the base of the shaft while using your mouth on just the head and upper shaft you can create the same affect as deep throating. Rubbing his delicious cock on your face, neck and chest is also quite visually stimulating so do not forget to show him how much you are enjoying in addition to focusing on your technique.
Masque Sexual Flavors- Oral Sex

Products for Better Tasting & Smelling Ejaculate

As for products, there is one product that is specifically geared toward not just covering the taste such as with a flavored lubricant, but it actually blocks unpleasant tastes in semen that make oral sex to some taste bad; tastes such as salts, bitters and proteins. This means it completely disguises the taste of semen and allows lovers to enjoy swallowing it should they desire to try. It is called Masque Sexual Flavors and is quite effective at helping to completely change the taste and experience of oral sex on a man.

Communicate

If he thrusts or pushes you down a bit onto him and you find yourself gagging, pull back up and pause to let him know that it is uncomfortable. Lovers that have been together for a long period can also develop a signal that just politely lets them know of this discomfort. If he does not clue in on this you can come up and begin using your hand to recuperate or let him know that you were beginning to hit the gag reflex a bit and you want to rest a minute while playing with his cock. He most likely will be happy that you do this because the last thing a man wants is for you to throw up on him because you were too worried that he would not understand that his penis is going to hit the back of your throat from time to time and cause a gag reflex.

If you really have an issue with gagging, let him cum elsewhere whether in a condom, in your hands, on himself, inside you (vaginally or anally), on your chest or neck as you revel in it. The best thing to do to make your intentions known is to make a comment before or during oral sex to let him know where you want him to cum. You can make this sound really sexy if you say it with passion. For example- "I can't wait to feel you cum in between my breasts, I want to rub it all over me!" Note the positive approach?

For men - a common question is whether or not to let your partner know if you are going to ejaculate. See our article- Giving A Heads Up for more on that topic.

Body Strategies

Having him on his back allows you to better control his thrusting by using your forearms to push him down if he begins to thrust to a point that it is uncomfortable for you. You can also gently tug on his testicles as though you were pulling on the reins while riding a horse to let him know he needs to slow it down. Remember not to do this too hard, as you don't want to cause him pain, rather just enough to cause him to come back and allow you to avoid gagging.

Hand & Mouth

One of the best ways to give oral sex is to also include your hands. Any one that knows how to give a blow job well will tell you that the following technique is a must when your mouth is tired, your gag reflex is getting triggered or he is well endowed and deep throating is a challenge. The best of us get tired!

Taking your hand, make a fist around the shaft of your lover's penis with your little finger resting on his pubic bone. Then at the same time take your mouth and go up and down the head and upper shaft of his penis while you go up and down with your hand at the same time. This gives the same sensation of you "deep throating" him (taking him deep into your throat). Adding different combinations with both hands, or your mouth make for creativity and fun!

Quick Fellatio / Blow Job Tips

The mucous membrane that is inside the mouth is similar to the lining of the vagina or anus and the moist slippery feel of the mouth and tongue on the penis can be extremely pleasurable. That is why fellatio can be incorporated as part of a couple's foreplay, meant to heighten sexual arousal, or it can be the main activity, meant to bring the man to orgasm. Remember, it does not have to be the finale.

The reasons that fellatio is generally more socially accepted are as follows-

  • Fellatio between disease-free people does not in and of itself lead to disease.

  • The major religions have relaxed their historical prohibitions about fellatio being sinful and unnatural.

  • It is very pleasurable!

Be Careful

  • Remember that just as you do not want pain or discomfort during this process, neither does your lover.

  • Be sensitive to their needs and watch their body language for cues as to what is comfortable and what is not.

Be Clean

  • Nothing like the smell of "ball rot" to turn off your partner. Unless they tell you they love it when you are sweaty and stinky, take a shower or take a warm washcloth and clean up not just your penis, but your balls and perineum area.

  • You may even want to use it on your anus as your lover may like to give you a rim job.

  • A really quick way is to use baby wipes. Strippers have been known to use them all the time for quick clean ups and you can too!

Pubic Hair Clean Up

  • Giving a tug to the ol' short and curlies will help to loosen any hairs that are about to fall out and prevent them from going into your lover's mouth, which is not the most pleasant sensation.

  • You can also shave or trim your pubic hair for a more tailored look and feel.

Oral Sex Toys

There are many types of oral sex toys on the market. Before you get any of them, make sure they are non-toxic as there are many products on the market today that contain toxins. We provide a great deal of education about this in our articles under our site.

There are two basic types of oral sex toys- 1) There are the sex toys and lubricants you can use while performing oral sex. 2) There are the sex toys that simulate oral sex such as the Sqweel Wheel. To view these types of products, see our Oral Sex Toy section below-

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Advanced Fellatio Instruction

What You Receive
Positions
Techniques
Instruction

What is covered in the manual and video -

If you do not want to purchase anything else from our site you are welcome to just purchase the manual by itself-

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  • Basic & Best
  • 68 1/2
  • 69
  • Face Fucking
  • On Your Knees
  • On The Side
  • Visual Importance
  • Stage Fright
  • The Exhibitionist
  • Deep Throat
  • Gagging Remedy
  • Using Teeth
  • Kisses & Tongue
  • Do The Twist
  • Shirley Temple Licks
  • Head, Shaft & Scrotum
  • Grabbing His Behind
  • Making Him Tight
  • Hand Job Combo
  • Vacuum
  • Double Penetration
  • Teeth Guards
  • Thigh Highs
  • Hummers
  • The Harmonica
  • The Drum
  • Hot & Cold
  • Women's Lubricant
  • Hands On Your Head
  • Adore The Cock
  • Penis Anatomy
  • Messes
  • Orgasms
  • Perineum Love
  • Anal Love
  • Nipple Love
  • Mouth Love
  • Fatigue Warning
  • Health Concerns
  • STD Prevention
  • Hygiene
  • Tips For Receiver
  • Clean Up
  • Post Etiquette
  • Toys & Products
  • Fellatio In Water

Access to the manual download is given immediately after you place your order through your online receipt and an email.
Please contact us if you have difficulty accessing it as we are happy to assist you.




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