Sex Joke of the Week- A gynecologist decides that he'd had it with gynecology. He wanted to go and fulfill his lifelong dream and become a car mechanic. So he studied hard, and when he felt he was ready, he registered to go take the state licensing test. The results of the test arrived a few weeks later, and with trembling hands he opened the envelope to discover that he passed with flying colors! He got a score of 200 points out of the 100 points possible. "200 points out of 100 points possible?" he asks himself. "How can that be?" So he calls the licensing board and they tell him: "You see sir, you received 50 points for taking the engine apart perfectly, 50 points for putting the engine back perfectly, and 100 EXTRA points for doing it all through the muffler."

 

by Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO
Holistic Wisdom Founder

Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO Author & Sexologist Holistic Psychotherapist Founder Of Holistic Wisdom Playboy's Female Ejaculation Expert Member of American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists AASECT

Why does the world need sex therapists and sexologists? While sex is the most natural thing in the world, it can also be frightening, mystifying, and difficult to talk about, let alone engage in it.

Often, when people have been sexually molested, endured a sexually-related illness, or have been psychologically traumatized, they are unable to react to sexuality in a healthy manner.

Many people who struggle with heir sexuality may no longer trust others or feel loving towards themselves. They may believe their sexual feelings are dangerous and wrong. For these people sex therapists are important, because it is this type of therapist who can work clients through such problems, and encourage them to accept themselves and sex as important and valuable parts of their lives.

What Is Sexology?

Sexology is an evolving science and so there isn't a universally agreed description of what it means, but in a nutshell, it is the study of all aspects of sex and sexuality. A sexologist studies all aspects of sexuality from physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

Sexologists typically work within the belief system that sex is good, that relationships should be meaningful, and that intimacy is a desirable goal. Sexologists meet all sorts of people, and must be nonjudgmental, nonsexist, and not homophobic. They treat emotional problems, communication difficulties, and past traumas as part of teaching and/or providing therapy. Sexologists try and get to the root of the problem, as well as addressing the surface issue.

What Do Sexologists Do?

From teaching, writing to therapy Sexologist are usally quite active in helping others to be better educated and more satisfied sexually. Sexologists may host workshops and classes for individuals, couples and families, school groups, and community and religious centers while giving information on everything from abuse recovery to using a condom.

Sexologists should be able to help people who are experiencing difficulties with physical disabilities, illness, surgery, aging, or alcohol/drug abuse. They should be trained in a number of areas, making them ready for any issue that may come up as sexual issues are often interrelated to other aspects of a person's life.

Who Is A Good Candidate To Be A Sexoloist?

If you want to be a sexologist, you can't be shy about discussing graphic sexual acts, and highly personal and confidential issues with people. Sexologists must be comfortable discussing the sex lives of strangers openly, honestly, and in detail. Therefore, they must be professional, mature, and nonjudgmental. Can you imagine a asking a sexologist advise on whether or not to swallow during a blow job and them wincing and saying "Ooooh, that's gross." Sexologists ultimately must see sexuality as beautiful.

Sexologists need to be good listeners, as well as excellent communicators. They need to have an interest in anatomy as well as psychology. They need to be skilled mediators, as they may be dealing with couples who have differing views and opinions. They need to be sensitive, tactful, respectful, and they need a good sense of moral ethics.

What Kind Of Education Do They Have?

Sexologists usually have at least a bachelor's degree in psychology, family studies, medicine, nursing, pastoral counseling, social work, or sexology, along with a course or diploma in counseling and therapy. The educational path of a potential sexologist or sex therapist should cover sexual and non-sexual therapy techniques, as relationship problems and past traumas can be the main glitch in the client's sex life. It is a good idea for sex therapists to register themselves with an association such as ASSECT or a non-sexual association such as NASW (National Association of Social Workers) or other type of monitored association. Registration ensures clients that the therapist is a legitimate, trained counselor. Certification by these associations requires that therapists have rigorous, recognized training, so it may be a good idea to contact an association to plan your specific educational path.

Also, because many states have laws about practising psychotherapy they must be registered with the state (if required) to do so.

Sexual Health Schools

 

 

by Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO
Holistic Wisdom Founder

Peace Unity Love

Watching the movie Hero I began to reconnect with a wisdom deep within that I had been out of touch with for a while. I have been so often been overwhelmed with grief due to the great violence that many men and women choose to carry out everyday throughout the world. Whether it be on a global or even interpersonal level, there seems to be a better way to resolve conflict in this world than through violence.

The reasons we become involved in hate and violence are many. For some it is in the name of love, for others it is for honor, and then there are those that it is for hate. No matter the root of the emotion driving the violence I have found that it is fear that brings us there.

Look at any acts of violence... domestic abuse, hate crimes or war and you will find a deep insecurity inside the person exhibiting the violence. Is it not true that bullies are the most insecure deep down of all of us?

Watching the movie Hero, I was reminded that it is simply the evolution of man to evolve from a primitive, gut reaction of violence, to mental and emotional grappling and conflict with violence inwardly and outwardly, and then finally to understand that the violence does not soothe the pain that evokes it, rather, it amplifies it.

As Hero is a story based on China's history, I began to think of China as a country. I have often found myself feeling it was such a symbol of adversarial values in my capitalist country.

Then I began to think about what China's leader was trying to accomplish in the movie. He was trying to unify the world to stop violence. I thought of the principles of communism and a light bulb went on... the goal was originally to have all men treated equally in a unified society. How peaceful, yet because China was trying to create that world through violence, force and control... it ultimately failed. It occurred to me that they had part of the puzzle to a peaceful world, but not the whole picture.

It made perfect sense to me that the answer was that we all have a piece of the puzzle... all of us, from each individual, to each family, to each group of friends, to each city, to each state, country, etc. We all have a piece and all of our pieces create the whole picture... the picture of unity and peace for all human kind.

What the Chinese got wrong was that we should not all be the same, that unity should occur not through force, but by choice. It is through a peaceful example that we finally see true power. In the end of the movie, when the character Broken Sword dies, he gave the greatest gift to his lover by showing her that he believed so much in the peace and greater good of humankind that he was willing to give his life to show it and in turn teach her the most valuable lesson she needed which is that her revenge and hatred were only amplified through her violence. Nothing was solved and it is only through peace, acceptance of diversity and free will of others that we can find the harmony that we so long for in our hearts.

It is in accepting that not only are all people different, but that all people are evolving at different rates and working on different issues. To expect everyone to be ready for the same reality that we want to create is naive and ultimately will cause us to fail. It is when we accept that it is through unconditional love we will find the peace we seek. Love of someone who is different than we are, who believes different things, who behaves differently and who at times may even cause us pain. When we can find unconditional love for ourselves and for all else then we will finally experience our evolutionary purpose.

Valentine Story Contest!