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January 8, 2005

Quote of the Week-

Sex is dirty only if it's done right.

- Woody Allen

~ The Sexual Wisdom™ Section     
   
Sex In The News

~ Condom Testing Reveals The Best Brands
~ Year Of The Rooster "Unlucky" For Weddings?
~ The Sperm Sorting Machine

~ Pregnancy Complication Predictions Via Testing

~ Morning After Pill Not Affecting Sexual Behavior
~ HIV Replication Blocked Through New Method

 

Sex Joke of the Week-

Safe Sex

 

 

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How To Become A Porn Star?
How It Really Works

Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., C.E.O.
Holistic Wisdom Founder

Many people write to ask how they can become a porn star and I wanted to write an article on the topic so that this information can be shared with anyone interested.

The first thing I want to say is that we are not porn producers and do not hire porn actors so please do not fall under the impression that we are a good place to contact for such a job.

Secondly, while we ourselves are not porn stars, we certainly know a great deal about the industry and know many people in it. What I can share with you is information that may help to discern if it is right for you or someone you know.

 

Is It Right For You?

The core issue that must first be addressed is if it is "right" for someone to do. This is certainly a choice that one should come to on their own terms. What I do recommend is that if you are considering it, you of course need to be over 18 in the USA to even contemplate it.

 

Timing For Making The Decision

However, beyond chronological age it is important to think about the choices that you have made in the past to make sure you are using the best judgment for this huge, often life altering decision. If you feel good about the choices you have made in the past and feel confident in your decision making skills and maturity level then perhaps you are in a "good place" to make the best choice now.

However, if you look back on your life with mountains of regret and feel that many of your choices ended up backfiring, perhaps it is not a good time to make this decision and a better time for you to do some heavy soul searching to first address why you have made unhealthy decisions in the past; address those issues and then revisit this decision.

The porn industry is a business and the actors or "talent" in it are often not provided with much consideration. Unless one becomes an "A-list" actor then most often the money is not much and you are asked to perform much more intense sexual acts like double anal penetration and group sex.

It may be a better choice to try and volunteer as an assistant or "Fluffer" before you dive in the deep end. For those of you who don't know, a "Fluffer" is someone who stimulates the actors (mainly males) to aid them in maintaining their erection for scenes.

You should also know that most likely you will be asked to perform with both sexes so those who are homophobic may want to think this through more carefully.

Also remember that most likely your family and friends will find out about it and it may impact your ability to get a job in the future. We all know about Vanessa Williams and her Playboy fiasco... just think what a potential boss for an public relations or grade school teacher will think if they find out about your porn history.

If you have or plan on having kids you need to take into consideration that while you may be able to explain to them what you do as a good choice for you, the other parents, teachers and kids may not and your child may have to face the stigma of their parent being a porn actor.

These are just a few of the things you need to think about before jumping into the porn industry as it is important to make a well thought out decision about something that can be potential controversial for you in various aspects of your life.

 

How Hard Is It To Be A Porn Actor?

It is very challenging to become a professional porn actor so if you are serious about making a career out of this be ready to really work for your shot at it. You should also note that is much more difficult for men than it is for women. However, women too are often shocked at how hard it is for them to get involved with a legitimate company and get paid well. For men, you have a very small chance at becoming a successful porn star and if you are only willing to do heterosexual scenes your chances are reduced even more.

 

Amateur Porn Vs. Professional Porn-

It is obviously much easier to become an amateur porn actor than it is to be a highly paid professional porn actor. If you want to sell content to people, make sure to only send a small sample and have a contract and asking price ready. The best way to know what the industry is like is to spend a lot of time researching content buyers, distributors and don't forget the legal aspects of all of this.

These days it seems that many people take their home movies to the web. Of course selling them on their own site takes some eCommerce business savvy and you can learn more about this through our Get Rich Selling Amateur Adult Videos or Pics Online article.

 

Men Who Want To Be Porn Stars

Although living in California helps, it is not the old real estate adage of Location, Location, Location that will make it possible for you to become a porn star... rather it is Endurance, Endurance, Endurance. You will not just be judged by how good looking or well hung you are, in order to be successful as a leading man you must be able to get hard, stay hard, and have orgasms on command. It takes practice, stamina and you should know that once you audition, you pretty much have one shot so get ready for performance anxiety.

Of course most of the people who seem to want to become a porn star tend to be men and they tend to want to be a highly paid professional. Again, there really is not a lot of openings for men who want to do professional porn and even less for all heterosexual porn. Perhaps you may have noticed if you are an avid porn watcher but there are only a few "A-list" guys and they get used over and over in features because they are reliable and porn makers don't like having to audition too often.

Insider Tip-

Find an extraordinarily beautiful girl who will let you (exclusively) ride her coat tails into the Adult Film Industry. However, note that unless you have a strong agreement, she needs to break into the industry herself and may have to drop you to attain her own success. Remember, this is a highly competitive field and hundreds of drop dead gorgeous women attempt to break into the industry every year.

 

The Cold Harsh Truth For Men-

If you do make it, don’t expect to make a lot of money unless you do gay porn and/or become an "A list" actor. Guys get paid “peanuts” to perform (yes, the girls can make good money, but keep in mind that most viewers look at the girl and could care less about the guy. Guys in the industry of straight porn of often seen as a prop by film makers.

Producers and Directors usually will not accept new guys, no matter who recommends them or what their “credentials." If you are fortunate enough to be chosen for an audition if you desire one, you really only get one chance and your critics will be harsh.

Remember that there’s a lot of pressure on a man in this industry as he can’t fake an erection or a cum shot, nor can he hide climaxing before the Director tells him to cum; likewise, he has to have a solid erection whenever the camera is rolling, and for as long as it takes to film his portion of the scene (normally one-two hours) and despite constant starting and stopping for such things as changing camera batteries and/or film, relocating the lighting and/or camera angle, shifting back and forth to foreplay and long shots, potty, make-up, cigarette, water, etc. breaks, and on and on!

 

How Men Are Judged & Can Prepare-

Penis size, looks, muscles, and acting ability are important but again, it will ultimately boil down to your ability to get an almost-instant erection, maintain it, control it, and orgasm only when told to (and then do it quickly without wasting the time of the production employees). Be prepared to have perfect personal hygiene, get HIV tests every month, and be prepared to sit around on sets, sometimes for hours, waiting for your scene to be filmed.

 

How Women Are Judged & Can Prepare-

Facial appeal, breast size (shape and overall appearance), vaginal appearance, body (tone, body fat, skin tone), hygiene (pubically groomed, long hair on head is preferable, nicely done nails, good natural beauty with or without make-up) and finally your acting ability. You have it easy compared to men because with a little lubricant you can fake your way through the whole production. Be prepared to get HIV Tests every month, and like men be prepared to sit around on sets, sometimes for hours, waiting for your scene to be filmed.

 

Get An Agent-

Getting a reputable agent is key. They will not only help you with advice, bookings and providing a valuable resource but they can handle negotiations for you by already having your needs in mind while using their vast knowledge of the industry. You must find a reputable Agent or you can get screwed before it gets filmed!

An AVN article listed a top agent as Jim South of World Modeling (818) 986-4316. But do not call until you are serious about doing this and are prepared for a meeting. Calling an agent with too many questions from not doing your homework will be a sure sign that you are not ready to even get an agent let alone start your career in porn.

 

Contests & Other Opportunities For Women



Farrah
Judge For The World Porn Contest

 

There is contest for women by Pure Pleasure Productions to become a porn star and the prize is $100,000. WorldPornSearchContestant.com. Porn stars Farrah and Santino Lee have agreed to be a celebrity judges for the promotion. All entrants that pass the initial screening and have their video published on WorldPornSearch.biz will receive $100 just for submitting their video.

Another new Internet site has hit the market. PornoProAm.com has fresh new ideas on the web. New to the Adult Industry and geared for the Voyeur and the Exhibitionist. With a variety of beautiful adult actresses who are featured each month, the members of this site can have the opportunity star in a porno with a seasoned professional. Each month a member is randomly selected to be flown to the Porn Capitol of the World, in Southern California, to become a Porn Star.

 

Top Ten Rules When Working In Porn-

1.

Understand Images Are Forever
Once you are captured on film your work is there for all the world to see and will remain available should the distributor choose. Even if your video is discontinued it will still be out there and may even become pirated and viewable illegally. Not only that but the pictures promoting the film may not only be used by the distributors but may be easily copied by anyone who visits the web sites selling them.

You will always run the risk of someday having a friend or family member and/or employer seeing your photo or video. Will you be able to handle their reaction? Read about what happened with us for simply becoming sex educators in our article- Risks Of Working In Sexual Health

 

2.

Be Current In Testing For STDs

When you show up on a set you will be asked for your HIV test and (possibly) for more STD test paperwork. Don't show up without them and keep them current. Thirty days is the current requirement. Don't work with anyone who has old paperwork or who "forgot their papers." It's your health at stake.

 

3.

Have Your Proper Identification

When you show up on a set you will be asked for at least TWO forms of photo identification. Don't leave home without them. The industry is required by Federal law to have a photo copy of your ID on file. You will be required to "slate" for the camera holding your ID. You will most likely be sent home, unpaid, for not having your ID with you.

 

4.

Have Good Personal Hygiene

Bathe, douche, keep your hair clean and trim. Keep your nails manicured and above all, see your dentist regularly. Your smile has to be captured. Close-ups during oral sex scenes will pick up improper tooth care. Don't let decay, chips and yellowing keep you from getting work.

When you are on a set, freshen up between sex scenes. You'll also want the performer you're working with to do the same. Take the first step and be as fresh as you want him (or her) to be.

 

5.

Be Punctual & Quick To Perform The Way You Are Asked To-

Once you commit to a time, place and project, get there early. Remember, you are not the only person scheduled to be there. In a video you have your co-stars, the gaffers, the camera crew, the makeup crew, the wardrobe people, the director. If they can make it to the set on schedule, so can you.

If you blow off a shoot, or arrive very late, you will develop a deserved reputation for being unreliable. An agent you use will not want to risk recommending you as they too have a reputation to protect.

That will lead to less work, because time is money and the producer will still have to pay everybody for waiting for you. One of the best ways to be on time is to have your own reliable form of transportation. That is especially true in Los Angeles where over 80% of adult videos are made and where public transportation is more of a nuisance than a blessing.

Don't depend on anyone but yourself to get you to the set on time. "My ride was late" is not considered an acceptable excuse. Also, don't go out partying the night before a shoot. You want to look fresh and have your energy level up. Sleeping through an alarm clock is also considered unacceptable.

 

6.

You Are Being Paid To Be Cooperative

Remember that the screenwriter, producer and director have hired you to do a project that they envision. Most of them have spent hours developing a project that you could ruin in minutes by being uncooperative. Although most film-makers will listen to constructive criticism, or ask for some creative input, be very tactful and never forget that they are paying you to be in their project, not the opposite. Also be courteous, friendly and respectful of your co-workers. Prima donna attitudes are not tolerated easily.

 

7.

Do Only The Sex Acts You Want To

When you interview/audition for a part in a video, always ask what sex acts you need to perform in the project. If you have an aversion to a specific act, say so at the time and turn down the role.

An example of this would be, if you are asked to be in a video called "Ass Attack," and you dislike anal sex, don't accept the job. Do your homework. If you are an actress who doesn't like to perform with women, a title such as "No Man's Land" is definitely not for you.

Do not wait until you are on a set to bow out of a scene. Time is money to the producer. Let him know before you are hired what or who you will not do. The only exception not to go through with a scene that you agreed in advance to do is the lack of proper HIV test papers by your partner.

 

8.

Don't Perform Free Samples On A Producer

You do not have to go the "casting couch" route to get a job. Most of the legit agents, casting agents, directors and producers are not required to get HIV tests done. You are hired on the basis of your talent, appearance, reputation and availability. Having free sex to get a part does not guarantee you the job.

 

9.

Don't Sign The Model Release Form Until You Have Payment

We shouldn't have to explain this one, but you would be very surprised to learn how many actresses have fallen for such lines as "I forgot my checkbook, come back tomorrow." The producer can't sell the footage until after has the model release, don't give him one until you've been paid.

 

10.

Be Loyal To Your Original Agent

This is the person that helps your career with advice, contacts with companies, gets you the auditions, books your road trips and gives you a shoulder to cry on. Do not back stab them or treat them badly. Treat your agent as you want him to treat you.

 

Porn Resources: Directories-

For a directory of studios and producers you should visit the AVNonline.com site's directory.

However it may be best to start by getting an agent. The adult model agencies are also available on the AVNonline.com site's directory.

 

Examples of A-List Porn Stars-

Female Porn Stars
Male Porn Stars

Jesse Jane

Tera Patrick

Matthew Rush
Pete Kuzak
Teagan Presley
Belladonna
Shane Rollins
Pavel Novotny
Jenna Jameson
Janine Lindemulder
Dick Wolf
Ron Jeremy
Cytherea
Briana Banks
Dean Phoenix
Kurt Lockwood
Sunrise Adams
Devon
Mark Dalton
Marcus Iron

Questions?

If you feel we did not cover something you wanted to add to this article or do not know about, let us know as we will look into following up on it. Thanks!

 

 

 

 

Congratulations to Jeff of Cedar Rapids, Iowa
for winning the New Years Eve 2005 Raffle!

Enter The February Charity Raffle!


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For only $5 you will automatically receive access to the Fellatio Fun Online Manual for FREE (A $14.99 value) just for entering, so you automatically win and you get to help a charity! You will also be entered to win the grand prize!

 

 

 

 

 

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Movie Review
Our Inside Scoop
Our Rating
Out Of Four Stars-


Iron Jawed Angels

Now On HBO

Whether you already know about it or not women had to endure an extreme fight for women's voting rights. You will be truly blown away by Iron Jawed Angels as it captures it with passion and accuracy. It is a movie both men and women should see and it is certainly deserving of our four star rating. It is moving, inspirational and is truly a great film in it's subject, but also it's presentation.

Hilary Swank (Boys Don't Cry) and Frances O'Connor (Mansfield Park) star as second-wave suffragettes Alice Paul and Lucy Burns, who led the final fight for the 19th Amendment to the Constitution.

Actors include Julia Ormond (Smilla's Sense of Snow), Angelica Huston (Prizzi's Honor, The Grifters), and Brooke Smith (Vanya on 42nd Street) provide highly moving performances.

 

 

Ask
Lisa

With hundreds of eMails coming in every day and while I answer many, it is not possible for me to reply to all of them. However, I wanted to provide a section where we take some of our readers questions and post them on our web site so that we can provide answers so that everyone can benefit from having the information available on our web site.

To submit your question such as those shown below eMail us for consideration of publishing it in our next newsletter.

See all of Lisa's Q&A Under Relationship & Sex Advice

 

Dear Lisa,

I was thinking about buying a sex toy to try with my partner, and I don't know whether to ask her if she would be interested or to surprise her. Your opinion would appreciated.

P.S.- What toy should I start with, she is a smaller women.

Thanks,

B-R, in NYC

 

Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO

 

Hi BR,

Thank you for your inquiry. You have asked an excellent question and I would love to include it in our next newsletter. To answer your question, I think that whether or not to surprise anyone with a sex toy can be a gamble.

How much of a gamble can only be discerned by you. Not just because they may not want a sex toy in general, but you may not get the one that they would enjoy or feel comfortable with using.

If you do decide to surprise someone with a sex toy as a gift or just to introduce some excitement then here are some things I would think about...

 

1)
Ask yourself if the person you are purchasing it for is open to sexuality. Are they likely to be receptive to new things in the bedroom? Are they comfortable with receiving pleasure? Would they ever visit an adult site to look at products? If the answer is yes to questions such as these, then you are certainly on the right track in thinking about SURPRISING them with a sex toy.
2)
Sometimes, a little hinting can be a good thing. Yet, how to bring it up can be tricky. One way to do this is to mention something as mainstream such as the Joanne Webb case where she was arrested for selling sex toys, or the Sex in the City episode where Samantha uses a Rabbit Pearl. You can then see what their reaction is to such topics and even ask for their opinion on such things without ruining the surprise that you intend on getting them one.
3)
Sometimes being bold and outright taking them to our web site is a great way to see what they may be interested in and what may turn them on. You can tell them that you heard that our web site is woman owned and recommended by women and that you would like to take a look at it with her to see if there is anything you both can do to help you be a better lover to her... including toys. You can purchase a toy or item then, or you can surprise her with one and buy it later. Nevertheless, you have a much better idea of the items she may be more interested in.
4)
If you are going to completely surprise your partner with a toy, then the best one to start off with is going to be a vibrator. Vibrators are the best sex toy for any woman as they can stimulate our clitoris to a degree that is HIGHLY effective at achieving an orgasm.

There are two vibrators I think are incredible for clitoral stimulation (as well as nipple, and anal stimulation) which are the Hitachi Magic Wand and the Waterdancer. The reason I mention the Hitachi Magic Wand first is because you can give it someone as a back and neck massager with "added benefits."

There is nothing sexual on the box and it was originally designed with that in mind. This way, you are "safe" as you can tell them that you wanted to give them great massages. There is no way that a woman will turn you down when it comes to a nice back massage and they can be slowly introduced to the idea of using it for clitoral, labia, anal or nipple stimulation. Speaking of which, the Hitachi is a very powerful vibrator so it is truly a must have in the world of vibrators.

The second toy I mention is the Waterdancer because it is small, quite, discreet, and waterproof. Not to mention this is a very powerful vibrator for it's size.

It also has a bunny attachment that I highly recommend for awesome clitoral stimulation. These are one of our best sellers and I personally use mine quite often. It is great for solo play, but also small enough to be used while having sex for clitoral, anal and nipple stimulation.


Of course if a woman really wants penetration with good vibrations, then the Rabbit Habit is the way to go as the vibrator on it is out of the world fantastic and the shaft rotates so it stimulates both the clitoris and g-spot and is great for female ejaculation. It is also the cordless version of the famous Rabbit Pearl so it's lack of wire to a battery pack makes it nicer for use.

I hope that my reply has provided you with the help you needed to make your decision.

Best,

Lisa

 

 

 

Hi Lisa,

What is a dental dam and how do you use one?

Curious,

Cadence

 

Hi Cadence,

Dental dams are often used in sexual situations to prevent sexually transmitted disease for cunnilingus (oral contact with female genitals) and analingus (oral/anal contact). They are six-inch squares of latex and were first used by oral surgeons.

Dental dams are used by those who want to practice safer sex techniques by placing them between your tongue and your lovers labia or anus. For those of you who are too embarrassed to purchase one on-line or in a store, you can always purchase a latex glove and make your own.

To make your own dental dam, cut open the latex glove along one side and presto, there you have it, your own home-made dental damn. Dental dams are an extremely effective means of preventing infection from vaginal or anal secretions. There is little data available on rates of infection after use of the dental dam.

A second option (which is less good) because it is untested, some people claim that plastic wrap may also help to prevent the transmission of some infections. If you are to try this method, I would recommend using a few sheets as there is not way to know right now if it is an effective form of safe-sex.

To reduce the rubber taste you can rinse the dental dam to remove the powder they are are often covered in (which can not only can irritate the genital area, but can leave a funny taste in the mouth).

You have to keep holding the dental dam in place while using it as if it moves and allows for body fluids to get over the top, then you have just defeated the whole point of safety. You may want to have several dams nearby and ready for use and mark the dams on one side with a pen, so that if the dam gets set aside during passionate foreplay, you'll know which side is for the licker and which for the lickee. Better yet, use a fresh dam and avoid the possibility of exchanging body fluids. I strongly advise that you throw the dam away after one use.

To increase sensation put some lubrication between the labia/anus and the dental damn. Only use water based lubricants (we recommend Astroglide for a non-flavored selection) when using dental dams. For better taste add a flavored lubricant such as our highly recommended ForPlay lubricants in many flavors.

Hope that helps answer your query into the dental dam and how to use it.

Best,

Lisa

 

 

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