From A Caterpillar To A Butterfly: What Makes People Really Change?

Change & Self Awareness

Have you ever felt like you're doing all the self-reflection but nothing seems to budge? You're not alone! Sometimes, it can feel like you've spent more time analyzing yourself than a fitness tracker tracking steps, and yet... no breakthrough.

Don't worry—there’s science behind why change can feel so elusive. For a long time, researchers couldn’t quite figure out why people have sudden “a-ha” moments that lead to big shifts.

But now, we’re starting to uncover how the brain works when it comes to personal change—and why it’s so darn tricky sometimes.

Why Criticism Does Not Work for Long-term Change

Here’s a crucial nugget: when you constantly criticize yourself, your brain reacts as if there’s an actual physical danger. It triggers a “fight or flight” response, releasing neuro-adrenaline, like you're about to face off with a wild animal. So, instead of helping, all that self-criticism keeps you stuck in survival mode.

Spoiler: harsh self-talk is the real enemy here!

Studies show that constant self-criticism not only blocks change, but it can also raise your anxiety and make psychological treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) less effective​.

What Fosters Real Change?

Research from UC Berkeley tells us that self-compassion is the game-changer. When people are kind to themselves, they’re more likely to learn from mistakes and grow. So, it’s time to stop being your own worst critic and start showing yourself the same kindness you’d give a friend who needs a pep talk. That’s the real secret to transformation.

So, let's go easy on ourselves and enjoy our own glow-up, like a butterfly that’s just rolled out of its snug little cocoon.

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