Trusted for 23+ Years
Condom Came Off During Sex
Dr. Lisa Lawless, CEO of Holistic Wisdom
Clinical Psychotherapist: Relationship & Sexual Health Expert
What To Do
It happens to many people; while having sex, you suddenly realize that the condom isn't on anymore. You look everywhere and still can't find it. Is it possible to have the condom stuck inside of you? How far up could the condom go?
A condom cannot enter the uterus from vaginal sex, but it can travel up inside the fornix area. If you imagine the cervix as a castle wall, the fornix would be the moat around it. In other words, there's a slightly recessed area around the circle of the cervix into which something like a condom could get tucked. Keep in mind that while some lost condoms wind up there, others get lost in bunched-up sheets, between the mattress and the wall, or some other obscure place. Make sure to look around you in addition to inside you.
What To Do If It Is Inside The Vagina
Have your partner sweep their middle finger (with trimmed fingernails) around the outer circle of your cervix. Your partner may feel it and be able to pull it out. If you can get a flashlight and spread yourself open, sometimes you can see it.
You can also try douching or using the stream of a tub faucet or removable showerhead to flush it out or at least get it lower and more easily reached; however, remember that using water inside you to flush it out may expose you to any ejaculate that was in the condom.
If any ejaculate was in the condom, you are now more at risk for STDs and pregnancy. To prevent pregnancy, you will want to make sure you use spermicide or another precaution to ensure that there is no pregnancy.
See a gynecologist if you can't find it in you or the room and cannot find it inside you. You don't want it to stay lodged in your vagina as it can cause potential health problems if it remains inside you.
When it comes to anal sex, there is nothing to stop a condom from traveling up into the rectum so that you cannot retrieve it, but it may actually be easier to remove than if you lose it vaginally as it will most likely come out on its own.
What To Do If It Is Inside The Rectum (Anally)
Try using your or your partner's fingers. If that doesn't work, you'll most likely pass it with your next bowel movement. If it still does not come out, you can also try an over-the-counter laxative. As a last resort, you can contact your doctor for assistance.
The condom should be snug at the base of the penis and shouldn't slide around. The tip of the condom can be loose, but the base must be firmly attached.
You can make the condom more secure by sliding a penis ring over the condom. This can also make the penis feel more erect as it holds the blood in the penis better during sexual play.
Lubricant Inside The Condom
If you're putting lubricant inside the condom before it's put on, you may want to put a little less in there or go without lube altogether. You might want to buy dry condoms, making them wet on the outside only if you so choose.
Vaginal Or Rectal Dryness
If rectal or vaginal dryness occurs, it could have a pulling effect on the condom as you and your partner move back and forth. Make sure to use ample lubricant inside the vagina or rectum during penetration.
Reduce Vaginal Or Anal Contracting
Another cause can be intense vaginal or anal contracting caused by pleasure or anxiety. To remedy this, simply try to relax your body as much as possible to avoid grabbing the condom off the penis.
Erections can fluctuate, so the condom may loosen its grip and slip off. If this is an issue, a smaller-sized condom may help. Also, doing things that will maintain arousal during sex may help in this situation. Using a penis ring can help maintain an erection keeping the penis more rigid and engorged.
Avoid Desensitizing Creams
Be aware that desensitizing cream can also cause a loss of erection.
When withdrawing, do so right after ejaculation and hold onto the rim of the condom with your fingers (or with your partner's fingers). This can prevent the condom from coming off.